May 21st

May 21^st is going to be a hard day for us.  It will be a lot like December 27^th was for us.  Anytime parents have to endure any sort of operation on their child, it’s just not easy.  Regardless of how simple or how quick the operation will be, it’s nothing short of torture.  There is so much anxiety involved in the entire process.  It’s easy to persuade your head that all will be fine but convincing your heart, that’s a whole ‘nother story. 

On December 27^th, Chandler had ear tubes put in.  The operation was incredibly simple and quick but the anesthesia…oh that was tough.  It was hard to see him lose control of his sense of awareness after they gave him a small dose of a relaxant, before they took him back.  Even harder, though, was seeing his little self incredibly uncomfortable and restlessly sleepy afterwards.  He was out of it and really very unhappy.  It was heartbreaking to watch and he could not come out of it fast enough for me. 

On May 21^st, my sweet little Cooper will be having a dermoid cyst above his right eye removed.  If the cyst were to be on you or me, it would be removed in the office of a maxillofacial doctor with only local anesthesia.  But because of his age and the sensitivity of the location of the cyst, he has to be sedated and this will be treated as day surgery.  I’m not too incredibly concerned about the actual surgery.  But, there is risk in anesthesia and we have all heard too many horror stories about the side effects of anesthesia for me to feel completely comfortable about that aspect of the surgery. 

Our doctor has reassured us that the cyst will most likely only grow larger and that it would be safe to go ahead and remove it so the tissue can be tested, just to make sure it isn't malignant.  I want to know what it is, of course.  As his Mommy, I can't just look at this thing everyday and continue to worry about what it really is.  Just the thought of letting something dangerous stay in my baby's body sickens me.  It is our job to protect him and keep him safe.  It is highly unlikely that the tissue will be malignant, thankfully.  My prayers tonight will be for those who have children that have to endure so much more than ear tubes and dermoid cysts.  I know how emotionally draining this has been and will be for us.  I can't even begin to imagine the physical, heart-wrenching, sickening pain associated with having a child who is battling a terminal illness or debilitating disease.  I pray that tonight, even if just for a moment, I can carry their burden for them.  I pray comfort for their hurting hearts.  And I pray for peace and healing for their sweet babies.  I can pray these things in His name knowing that there are so many willing and ready to pray these things for us if we ever needed them.  We serve a mighty God, my friends!  I know that my God's protective hands will be covering my baby on May 21st and everything is going to be fine.  I know that if He brings me to it, He plans to see me through it and because of this, I have faith all will be fine.